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NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA/THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA/THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE
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NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/

Spremačice u Srbiji su poput  niže kaste u Indiji.

Ljudi ih previše često i stereotipno zamišljaju kao neobrazovane, izmučene žene, neurednih frizura, zboranih lica, u obaveznim plavim keceljama na preklop, borosana sandalama, i žutim, gumenim, višekratnim rukavicama koje mirišu na dezinfekciona sredstva i siromaštvo. Iznad svega, u Srbiji se od spremačice očekuje da ima štur  rečnik i da je ponizna. To je stereotip. Da spusti pogled ka zemlji kada neko prođe pored nje, da sluša lošu muziku u svojoj maloj, zadimjenoj kancelariji kada ugrabi pauzu za kafu. Od spremačice se zaista prećutno zahteva da trpi nasilje pognute glave i kao žena, i kao radnica.

Spremačice za male pare glancaju prozore, čiste WC, ribaju hodnike, peglaju, prazne pepeljare, istresaju kante za đubre lošeg mirisa u kontejnere, čekaju dobar deo života da voda proključa kako bi kuvale hiljade  kafa dobrim ljudima, ali i lošijima od sebe i zauzvrat ponekad dobijaju samo prezir.  Mada pored pranja vredno usisavaju stotine kvadratnih metarara dnevno, mnogi toga nisu svesni. Težak je to posao. I treba da se ceni.

Sedajući za tviter u februaru 2016. godine, tridesetosmogodišnja Novosađanka Biljana Kvrgić Ilić nije ni slutila da će njena poštena potraga za poslom postati ogromna neprijatnost.  Rečju, lepa, uticajna tviterašica koja ima oko 7000 pratilaca, javno tražeči posao spremačice prodrmala je taj stereotip, i navukla  gnev stotina tviteraša, koji su započeli  višenedeljno  vređanje njene ličnosti po internetu.

Fizura tviterašice Biljane je nafenirana, lice blago, damski je našminkana, nokti su joj  nalakirani, vidi se na profilnoj slici, a ona se usudila, kada je izgubila višegodišnji posao prodavačice u knjižari, jer ljudi sve manje čitaju i kupuju knjige,  da stavi oglas na tviteru da želi da bude spremačica, po kućama ili u nekoj firmi. Ne kao socijalni slučaj, već kao ponosna osoba što ne beži od još jednog posla koji zna da radi. I šta se desilo? Napali su je. Nisu birali reči. Stotine njih je osuđivalo da bez potrebe traži navodno nedostojan posao. Doživela je pravi medijski linč društvenih mreža, koji se prelio i u klasične medije.

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

U zemlji u kojoj je stopa nezaposlenosti veća od 20 odsto,  razapeli su pristojnu ženu koja samo hoće da radi jednostavan pošten posao. Procenili su da dami ne dolikuje da traži da bude prosta spremačica. Mediji su je progasili osramoćenom, neke ružne insinuacije nećemo ni prenositi, nije pristojno, a tviteraši su zaratili zbog nje nje. Jedni su tvrdili da žena s manikiranim noktima nema šta da traži s metlom i krpom u rukama, a drugi su najavljivali kako su joj našli posao, da bi bili u centru pažnje, i na kraju su slagali, tako nam je interno rekla. Ostala je nezaposlena. Zbog tog stresa obrisala je status kojim traži posao spremačice i sve do sad je odbijala da govori za bilo koji medij, smatrajući da joj mediji uništavaju život. Izgubila je svoj glas. To je naglasila u prepisci sa nama na tviteru 2016. godine.

„Novinari mi uznemiravaju porodicu i moj izbor je da ćutim“, odgovorila je kratko 2016. godine.

Tada smo odlučili da istražimo ovaj fenomen. Zašto se u Srbiji često smatra sramotom uzeti džoger i kantu u ruke da bi se preživelo, dok  je popularno biti razgolićena starleta u nižerazrednim rijaliti šou programima?

Novosadski psiholog Aleksandar Šibul iz Centra Antropos rekao je te 2016. da je bežanje tviterašice Biljanje Ilić Kvrgić od medija očekivano jer je doživela traume, pošto društvene mreže nisu uvek bezopasno i dobro mesto:

„To je novi oblik maltretiranja i mobinga, tako da društvene mreže i te kako stvaraju sada nove situacije vezane za ponižavanje, umanjivanje nečije vrednosti, ruganje, maltretiranje koje ostavlja  traume „

Psiholog Šibul, ipak, je smatrao, da van virtuelnog sveta Fejsbuka i Tvitera, većina ljudi normalno i s poštovanjem gleda na posao spremačice:

„Vrlo rado ljudi rade kao spremačice mislim, čak i sa višim školama, znam mnogo primera da im pred penziju nešto treba radnog staža pa ’ajde, bilo šta, samo da imaju neki posao da bi dopunili staž do penzije,  tako da mislim da ne postoji neka stigma ka fizičkim poslovima, sve to zavisi iz perspektive iz koje se gleda.“

Poznati vojvođanski sociolog Bojan Panaotović smatra da je Srbija u velikom problemu dok njome vladaju loše vrednosti:

„Važno je da se od medijske scene, pa nadalje, marljivo radi na promeni vrednosnog sistema, ali je važno da  građani, ljudi koji su na društvenim mrežama takođe dejstvuju u prilog morala, dobra i pravih vrednosti, ne možemo se uvek vaditi pod znacima navoda  samo na sistem a da na tviter zajednici napadnemo i optužimo nekoga zato što izgleda pristojno a želi da radi kao spremačica. Raditi kao spremačica je častan, pošten, posao bio stotinama godina, kroz našu istoriju, možda se nije zvalo spremačica nego nekako drugačije, i sada je to pošten posao i ostaće, a prodaja sopstvenog tela, ili sopstvenoga duha i duše, što neki drugi rade na nekim drugim planovima, postoje starlete i na duhovnom, i na političkom planu, i u crkvama, to je takođe loše“, rekao nam je Panaotović te 2016.

Zamolili smo Panaotovića da objasni šta su uzroci moralnog propadanja kolektivne svesti:

„Uzroci su mnogostruki, višeslojni, od krize morala, krize duha, krize vrednosti, destrukcije Jugoslavije koja je ostavila za sobom pustoš. U sociologiji je poznat termin anomije, to znači stanje pravnog, moralnog i svakog drugog vakuuma, gde se jedan sistem urušio, nestao je, a drugi sistem nije uspostvaljen… to je anomija… dakle, prešli smo iz socijalizma, iz jugoslovenskog sistema koji je imao pregršt mana, ali se znalo kakav sistem postoji u jedan divlji kapitalizam, u jednu divlju tranziciju u kojoj se norme i sistemi, i sistem vrednosti nisu uspostavili na pravi način.“

Panaotović naglašava da je porodica uzdrmana jer ljudi rade i po tri posla da bi preživeli, te u tome zanemaraju vaspitavanje dece, to jest preporučuje da malo manje rade kako bi nešto vremena odvojili  i za porodicu, bez obzira na delimični  ekonomski gubitak:

„Možda ćete ići na malo skromnije letovanje, ali ćete imati vremena za taj toliko stotina godina unazad negovan porodični ručak tokom koga ćete moći da popričate sa svojom decom i da radite na vaspitnom planu. Ima nade jer će institucije, uvidevši da je kaljuga i glib starletizacije javne scene pogubna, raditi na tome da se uspostavljaju prave vrednosti“

Pošto je 2016. Biljana Kvrgić Ilić bojkotovala sve medije, mi smo razgovarali sa hrabrom profesionalnom  spremačicom  iz Zrenjanina, Milenom Knežević, koja je pred kraj karijere a i dalje radi na nekoliko mesta da bi izdržavala porodicu. Želeli smo da shvatimo tačku gledišta jedne spremačice.

„U suštini taj posao je vredan. Ja imam dete, radim, trudim se, idem spremam po kućama, gdi god me zovu i ja smatram da je to posao OK za mene, ja drugi posao ne znam, imam samo osnovnu školu i to je to.“

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

Spremačica Knežević misli da je tviterašica Kvrgić iz Novog Sada nastradala 2016. jer ljudi očekuju da spremačica ne može da se nosi kao dama:

„Možda je gospođica ili gospođa lepa, drži do sebe, a to je neoprostivo, znači spremačica po njihovom nekom, našem narodskom izrazu, da se tako izjasnim, smatraju da ona najverovatnije ima nekog sponzora čim se tako oblači i doteruje i da tu postoji neka caka. Lično moje mišljenje, i da ljudi imaju zlobe u sebi, pakosti i ko zna čega još.“

Na kraju intervjua, spremačica Milena Knežević je ipak otvorila dušu i priznala da su spremačice neopravdano pri dnu društvene lestvice:

„Moj posao volim, obožavam, samo uvek ima znate ono stepenište pa dno i onda smo mi kao na dno“.

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

Milenu smo te 2016. Intervjuisali u ime svih spremačica, jer Biljana je odbijala svaki intervju.

Dve godine kasnije, uspeli smo da pridobijemo poverenje Biljanje Kvrgić Ilić. Dala nam je kratku izjavu. Pitali smo je kako je nasilje koje je doživela uticalo na nju:

„Zašto nisam htela da se oglašavam 2016 ?

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTHNisam javna ličnost a tabloidi su me linčovali. Izgubila sam poverenje u novinare“, otkriva Biljana ove 2018.

„Da li smatram da je izvršeno  nasilje nad ženama u toj priči, i da li bi muški rod tako prošao? Doživela sam diskriminaciju.

Naravno da muški rod ne bi imao te vrste komplikacije jer ovo je Balkan i muškarcima je sve dozvoljeno.“

Kako društvo može da suzbije nasilje nad ženama?, pitali smo Biljanu.

„Mi nismo društvo mi smo “hipnotisana gomila” koja živi po pravilima koja nameće Zapad“.

Kako ste danas poslovno i privatno?

“Poslovno sam mogla bih reći stabilna  imam posao koji naravno nisam dobila zahvaljujući društvenim mrežama nego sopstvenim trudom. Privatno sam,malo rastrojena jer je dete moga brata obolelo od leukemije pa sam malo rastrojena ali biće to sve dobro verujem i nadam se.”

Da li je cela afera naštetila Vama kao osobi ?

“I jeste i nije, ali uglavnom ne,  jer  ja sam veoma stabilna osoba, sigurna u sebe i svoje sposobnosti. Pobedila sam nasilje verom u sebe i bližnje, i jer se trduim da na tuđe nasilje  odogovaram tihom, ali snažnom ženskom pameću”, rekla je posle dve godine ćutanja najpoznatija spremačica u Srbiji.

THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

Cleaners in Serbia are like a lower caste in India.

People too often stereotype them as being uneducated, exhausted women, with messy hair, wrinkled faces, in mandatory blue overlapping aprons, ” Borosana” sandals, with multi-use yellow rubber gloves smelling of disinfectants and poverty. Above all, in Serbia a cleaner is expected to have poor vocabulary and to be humble. This is a stereotype. That she should look down when somebody passes by, listen to the garbage music in her tiny, smoky room during coffee break. Indeed, a cleaner was tacitly expected to endure violence and to bow her head both as a woman and as a worker.

Poorly paid they scrub the windows, clean the toilets wash hallway floors, iron, empty ashtrays, empty stinky trash cans into garbage containers, spend a huge part of their life waiting for the water to boil to make thousands of coffees  for good people and for those worse than themselves, and sometimes, in return, all they get is disdain. Although they also diligently vacuum hundreds of square metres on a daily basis, many are not aware of it. It’s a hard work. And it should be appreciated.

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

Preparing to send a tweet in February 2016, Biljana Kvrgic Ilic, 38, from Novi Sad had no idea that her fair search for a job will turn into great embarrassment. In a word, this pretty and influential Twitterer with around 7000 followers, has shaken this stereotype by publicly looking for a position of a cleaner, and outraged hundreds of twitter users who started a verbal fencing mach on the Internet.

With a nice hairstyle, calm face, ladylike make-up and polished nails, as you can see on her profile photo, Biljana dared, after losing her long-term job as a bookseller in a book store, as people buy and read books less than before, to post an add on the Twitter that she wants to be a house or office cleaner.

Not as a social case but as a proud person who does not hesitate to take yet another job she can do. And what happened? They attacked her. They used ugly words. Hundreds of them condemned her for unnecessarily looking for an allegedly indecent job.  She has been exposed to social media lynch mob, and eventually to the print media frenzy.

NAJPOZNATIJA SPREMAČICA U SRBIJI PROGOVORILA: „NASILJE SAM POBEDILA ŽENSKOM SNAGOM“/ THE MOST FAMOUS LADY CLEANER IN SERBIA BREAKS SILENCE: I HAVE OVERCOME VIOLENCE WITH FEMALE STRENGTH

In a country where unemployment rate is above 20 per cent, they crucified a decent woman who just wants to do a simple and decent job. They have concluded that a lady should not take a job of a rude cleaner. Media proclaimed her humiliated. Some ugly insinuations we won’t even mention, it’s not polite, while Twitterers raged war because of her.  Some maintained that a woman with polished nails should not grab a mop and a dustpan; others announced how they had found her a job, just to attract public attention. It turned out to be lies, as she told us. She is still jobless. Because of much stress she deleted the status in which she looked for the cleaner job and up until now she has been refusing to speak for any media believing that media are destroying her life. She lost her voice. This is what she stressed out in the text messages we have exchanged on Twitter in 2016.

“The journalists are harassing my family and I have decided to be silent, ” she replied briefly in 2016.

Then we decided to investigate this phenomenon. Why is it in Serbia often a shame to take a wet mop and a bucket in order to make a living,  while it is popular to be a nearly naked starlet in low-grade reality shows?

In 2016, Novi Sad psychologist  Aleksandar Sibul, from the Antropos Centre said that avoiding media by Twitterer Biljana Ilic Kvrgic is an expected behaviour due to trauma, since social networks are not always a good and harmless place.

„They are a new form of bullying and mobbing.  The social networks do create new situations in which people get humiliated, devaluated and mocked, which is traumatic.„

Yet, Mr. Sibul believed that beyond the virtual world of the Facebook and the Twitter most people have a normal attitude toward the job of a cleaner and respect it.

„ People are glad to work as cleaners, I think, even those with higher education. I know a lot of cases when before retirement people need several more years of service and they take any job to complete the years of service. So I think there is no such stigma on physical jobs, it all depends on your perspective.“

Bojan Panaotovic, renowned sociologist from Vojvodina, believes that Serbia is in big trouble as long as negative moral values prevail.

„ It is important that starting from the media scene, people work on changing the system of values, but it is also important that citizens, the people on the social networks, also advocate morality,  good and real values. We cannot always blame only ‘the system’, and attack and condemn somebody in the Twitter community because she looks decently yet wants to be a cleaner. A job of a cleaner has been a decent job for hundreds of years, throughout our history. Maybe it was called differently. It is still a decent job and will remain as such, whereas selling one’s body, or one’s soul and spirit, what other people do on some other levels… There are starlets on a spiritual and political level, and in the churches, which is also bad,“ said Panaotovic in the year of 2016.

We asked Mr. Panaotovic to explain the causes of moral decay of the collective awareness.

„The causes are many, multi-layered, from the moral crisis, spiritual crisis, through the crises of the values to the destruction of Yugoslavia which left emptiness. In sociology there is a term anomy defining a state of legal, moral and any other vacuum when one system collapsed, it disappeared, but another system has not yet been established. This is anomy… From socialism, from the Yugoslav system, which had many disadvantages, but was a system anyway, we entered wild capitalism, a wild transition during which the norms and the systems, the system of values, have not been properly established.“

Mr. Panaotovic maintains that family has been shaken because people take three jobs to make a living and they neglect bringing-up their children. He recommends them to work less and spend time with the family, despite some possible economic loss.

„ Maybe you will have a more modest holiday, but you will have time for this traditional family lunch during which you may talk to your children and bring them up correctly. There is hope, because when the institutions realize how ‘starletization’ of the public scene is detrimental,  they will work on establishing true values.”

As Twitterer Biljana Kvrgic Ilic avoided all media in 2016, we talked to Milena Knezevic, a brave professional cleaner from Zrenjanin. At the end of her career she still works at several places to provide for her family. We wanted to understand the point of view of a cleaner.

„It is in fact a valuable and decent job. I have a child, I do my best, I clean several houses, I go wherever they call me. This job is fine with me, I cannot do any other job. I have completed only the elementary school.“

Milena Knezevic thinks that Twitterer Kvrgic from Novi Sad got into trouble because people do not expect a cleaner will look and behave like a lady.

„Maybe this miss or madam is pretty and stylish, which is unforgivable. In their opinion, a cleaner should, let’s use the slang, she is probably someone’s sugar baby when she gets dolled up, there is a catch involved. I personally think that people are mean, malicious and the like.“

At the end of the interview. Milena Knezevic, the cleaner, eventually confined in us  and recognized that the cleaners are, unjustifiably at the bottom of the social structure.

„I like my job, I adore it, but there is always this staircase and the bottom, and we are always at the bottom.

We interviewed Milena in 2016 on behalf of all lady cleaners, because Biljana refused to give any interviews.

Two years later we managed to gain the trust of Biljana Kvrgic Ilic. She gave us a brief statement. We asked her how the violence she has experienced affected her.

“Why I didn’t want to speak publicly in 2016? I am not a public figure yet the tabloid press mob lynched me. I lost trust in journalists,” reveals Biljana in 2018. “Do I believe that women in that story have been exposed to violence and would men experience the same  fate? I was discriminated. Of course, men would not experience these types of complications because this is the Balkans and everything is allowed to men.”

How can our society suppress violence over women?”, we asked Biljana.

“As a society we are ‘a hypnotized crowd’ living according the rules imposed by the West.”

How are you feeling now both personally and professionally?

“I may say that professionally I am stable, I have got a job which, of course, I did not get thanks to the social networks but rather thanks to my own hard work. Privately, I am somewhat  upset because my brother’s child has been diagnosed with leukaemia, and it upsets me, but I believe and hope that everything  is going to be all right.

Did that whole scandal harm you as a person?

“Yes and no, but generally no, because I am a very stable person, confident in myself and my abilities. I have overcome violence by having confidence in myself and my family and because I do my best to respond to other people’s violence with calm, yet powerful female mind,” said the most famous lady cleaner in Serbia after two years of silence.

Piše/BY: Igor Aleksić ([email protected]), Translation: Jelena Milojkovic

 

 

 

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